It's A Date

Sometimes, relationships just fizzle. It’s not anyone’s fault, things just weren’t meant to be. How do you know your relationship is fizzling and it’s time to move on?

1. You Make Excuses To Avoid Spending Time With Her

If you are constantly making up reasons why you can’t spend time with your girlfriend, it’s time to move on. When you’re in a relationship, you should want to spend time with each other. It’s not a good sign if you’d rather spend time at your paralegal job than with your girlfriend. Some alone time is great, but it shouldn’t outweigh the time you spend together.

2. More Trouble Than It’s Worth

If your relationship is giving you more problems than it’s worth, it’s time to move on. When a relationship brings you stress, anxiety and heartache, it’s not worth it. Your relationship should make you happy and help you feel confident and secure.

3. If Only

When you start to have thoughts like “He’s perfect, if only…” you know it’s time to move on. You can’t change someone, and besides, what’s the point of dating someone if you aren’t happy with whom they are to begin with? If you find yourself trying to change your boyfriend, it’s time to move on. It will be better for both of you to find someone who appreciates you for who you are.

4. Justification

Taking your girlfriend’s negative behavior, or worse, abusive behavior, and turning it into something that is ok, is a dangerous game. If you’re justifying the negative things your boyfriend or girlfriend does, or doesn’t do, your relationship is not healthy, and it’s time to move on.

5. It’s All On You

If you’re putting way more work into the relationship than your boyfriend, it’s time to move on. Relationships are meant to be a partnership, with each half helping to keep it healthy. If you find you are the only one putting effort into it, it’s not a good relationship.

Ending a relationship for one of these reasons is never easy. Sometimes, strangely enough, it’s easier to break up with someone if they have committed a huge wrong. However, these five signs can be warnings that your relationship isn’t healthy, and it’s time to shape up or ship out.

Dating rejection is hard to deal with. No one likes to be turned down, especially when it feels so personal. Knowing this, most people naturally wait to ask someone on a date when they feel like it’s “safe.” They wait until they are relatively sure the other party is at least somewhat interested in them, and that the answer will be “yes.”

But how do you know when it’s safe? How do you know when your interest is being reciprocated?

Closed Body Language

If your crush has open body language, chances are they are into you too. Things like pats on the arm, a big smile and being generally approachable signs are all good cues that you are probably safe to ask for a date. If the girl you want to asks out doesn’t make eye contact, crosses her arms or avoids physical contact, you probably aren’t going to get a yes when you ask for a date.

Always Busy Syndrome

Have you been hinting at, even asking for, a date with the same guy for a few weeks? Does he always seem to have other plans, have to do homework or work at his administrative assistant job? Unfortunately, this probably means that he’s not interested in a date. Sometimes, people try to be nice by making up excuses or reasons why they can’t spend time with someone. The best approach may just be to tell someone you aren’t interested, but not everyone takes the best route.

Boredom

When you’re out with your date, does she act bored? Things like constant phone checking, short replies and forced conversations are signs that she’s not digging the date. Of course, this could just mean you need to change up the activity, but it could also be a sign that she isn’t that into you.

No Eye Contact

Very similar to body language, eye contact, or lack of, can be very telling. If your crush seems more interested in his surroundings than in you, he may not be open to a date. Some people don’t make eye contact out of nervousness or shyness, so be careful not to confuse these emotions.

Next time you’re unsure about asking someone on a date, mentally go down this checklist to see if your crush exhibits any of these negative signs. If they do, move on and find someone who is just as interested in you as you are in them!

There are more ways to tell your boyfriend or girlfriend you care than the usual “I love you’s” and the compliments you give. In fact, sometimes these little gestures can mean more than the big things you do. Here are 10 new ways to show your significant other you love them or are thinking of them.

1. Leave a Note: This tried and true technique can be anything but cheesy. Leave a note at a time and in a place where your girlfriend will least expect it.
2. Random Text: You probably already text your boyfriend all the time. But, why not text him for no reason at all, except to tell him how great he is? A texted compliment is always fun to get, especially when you aren’t expecting one.
3. Surprise with a Favorite: If your boyfriend loves a special pizza, or has a favorite movie, surprise him with them when he gets home from a long day of software development courses.
4. Do the Planning: If your boyfriend is the one that usually does all the date planning, take over for a night. Plan a great date you will both love, and let him live it up without having to worry about anything.
5. Take it Up a Notch: Take your girl out for a night on the town. Hit up a fancy restaurant and dress up nice. Doing something special now and then will be a nice change of pace for both of you.
6. Do What They Love: If your girlfriend is a die-hard fan of a band you really can’t stand, show your love by going with the flow and doing something your significant other loves.
7. Get Sentimental: Take your girlfriend to a place that has sentimental value to you both. Think the first time you kissed, your first dinner date restaurant or the place you first met.
8. Make a Gift: Homemade gifts are the best. Get crafty and make a gift for your boyfriend.
9. Show up Unexpectedly: Drop by your girlfriend’s campus and bring lunch.
10. Do a Chore: Scrape the ice off your boyfriend’s car, take the trash out or do the dishes. Nothing says love like doing chores!

Showing your boyfriend or girlfriend you care can be fun and creative. Look for new opportunities to do this and you’ll both find ways to spice up your relationship!

Texting has become one of the most common forms of communication. The ease, simplicity and speed of texting makes it an attractive way to send quick messages to friends, family and those we are in relationships with. Of course, there are lots of benefits to texting your boyfriend or girlfriend, but there is also some basic etiquette that can help you avoid potential pit falls.

Know When to Text

Texting is perfect for confirming plans or sending a quick “I love you!” However, there are definitely times you should not text. If you want to have a serious conversation, of any kind, you owe it to yourself and your girlfriend to do it face to face. Topics like changes in the relationship, future plans or problems should all be addressed in person.

Don’t Replace Real Conversations

It’s easy to get caught up in texting, and forget that it’s been a while since you and your boyfriend have had a “real” conversation. Don’t let texting become the most common way you talk to each other. If you do, you risk weakening your relationship due to poor communication. Make sure you see each other often enough to discuss things in person. If you’re in a long-distance relationship while you are in college, doing nursing clinicals or even in FBI training, remember that your phone can make calls as well as text, and use that feature too!

They Don’t Need to Know it All

A little space in a relationship can be a good thing. Depending on the level your relationship is in, that could be more or less space. But, your girlfriend probably doesn’t want to know every time you drink another Coke, or every time your team scores another touch down. Too much texting can get over bearing, and smother the other half of your relationship.

Using text messages to send quick notes and let your love know you are thinking of them is a great way to use this form of communication. Having serious conversations, missing out on face-to-face talk and over doing it are all things you should steer clear of in your relationship.

It’s true that dating can get expensive; but it doesn’t have to be that way. In fact, some of the most fun dates are ones that are inexpensive, or even free.

Free dates have the connotation of being cheap or tacky. But, by showing your date that you put real thought into the outing, and the date isn’t just thrown together, you’ll come away a winner. Here are 30 date ideas that won’t cost you a penny.

1. Go to an art museum.
2. Go hiking.
3. Be a tourist in your own city.
4. Go on a picnic and enjoy nature.
5. Stroll through an outdoor mall.
6. Check out historical landmarks.
7. Do dinner at home; complete with candlelight.
8. Teach each other your talents (an instrument or sport).
9. Go to the farmer’s market.
10. Hold a game night (video or board) competition.
11. Go sledding and then warm up with hot chocolate at home.
12. Go stargazing.
13. Roast hot dogs over a fire.
14. Do a photo shoot with your own camera and get some snapshots of the two of you.
15. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, animal shelter, the library or a children’s club.
16. Browse a bookstore.
17. Fly a kite at a park.
18. Go on a bike ride.
19. Try a new dessert recipe together.
20. Attend a free concert in your community.
21. Go Christmas caroling.
22. Dance in the living room, then make homemade pizza.
23. Play at a local playground.
24. Go house hunting, even if you aren’t in the market, and plan your dream house.
25. Visit a store like Best Buy or the Mac Store and take the latest toys for a test ride.
26. Have a movie marathon at home.
27. Put your art skills to the test with supplies you have on hand.
28. Work on projects to apply for weird scholarships, like duct tape outfits.
29. Draw on the sidewalk with chalk.
30. Go for a drive to some place new.

With all these ideas, you can’t use the “it’s too expensive” excuse for not dating. Start at the top and start crossing of these dates, one by one!

Believe it or not, there are lots of fun dates you can plan right on campus. Traditional college campuses are the perfect setting for unique dates, and even some online schools have satellite campuses that are full of dating opportunities.

An on-campus date does not have to feel corny or cheap. In fact, doing activities on campus can help you find creative ways to get to know your date.

Scavenger Hunt

Scavenger hunts make great group dates. To do this date, create a list of items to look for on campus. Make some easy and some more difficult, to make the hunt a challenge. The scavenger hunt can be an actual hunt where teams have to gather objects like a plastic fork, a pamphlet and something blue, for example. Or, you can do a photo scavenger hunt where players take pictures of the items on the list. This approach may let you be more flexible and include more unique things on the list.

Something Bigger and Better

For this game, you’ll have to be on campus before offices close and while students are still around. Or, you can do this in the evening at the campus dorms. Each team starts with something small, like a paperclip or quarter. Then, they find someone on campus, and ask to trade the item for something bigger and better. Then, they work to trade that item for something even bigger. The game continues for a set amount of time, then both teams meet up again. Whichever team has the biggest and best item in the end wins.

Campus Sites

If you aren’t looking for a game or group date, explore some of the sites on campus. Most college campuses have museums, special collections in the library, science centers, game centers and some even movie theaters. Find out what your campus has, and visit these sites. As a busy student, you often don’t realize all your campus has to offer.

On-campus dates can be a change from the usual dinner and a movie, and can give you a chance to really get to know your date. Next time you’re looking for a good activity, see what you can do on campus.

Even though you may be ready for spring, it’s still winter in most parts of the country. The sun is starting to come back out, but there is still a chill in the air. This time of year can make dating a little tricky because you want to stay inside where it’s warm, but don’t want to subject your date to multiple reruns of dinner and a movie.

Here are five indoor date ideas that are creative, fun and toasty warm.

#1 Roller Skating

Roller skating is not just for grade school kids. Take your date to the closest rink, tie on some skates and see if you still have what it takes to make it around the rink without falling. Add some ice cream or pizza and this date is rocking.

#2 Museum Tours

For a less active indoor date, hit up a local museum. If you’re on a budget, see if your campus has a museum with free admission for students. From art to dinosaurs and from ancient artifacts to natural history, there will be something there to pique you and your date’s interest.

#3 Indoor Miniature Golf

Just because you can’t play outside, doesn’t mean sports are out of the question. Find an indoor mini golf course and hit the links. Some friendly competition can be fun in a date and golf is a great activity for a group date. Winner gets to choose dessert!

#4 The Nickel Arcade

There are nickel and penny arcades in lots of cities. Taking your date out for a few rounds of Pac-Man and Mario will give you both a chance to get to know each other in a new situation. Don’t forget to redeem your tickets for a fun souvenir!

#5 Bowling

You can’t go wrong with bowling. Find some lanes, lace up your shoes and get going. Most bowling alleys have a snack bar, so you can do dinner or dessert while you play.

Winter dating doesn’t have to be boring. In fact, it can be a way to force you to try something new, and get creative. Don’t let the cold weather be an excuse not to get out. Grab a date and head for some indoor entertainment!

It’s that time of year again: Valentine’s Day. Whether you are in a relationship or not, you’re probably wondering what is expected of you on this one day of the year devoted to romance.

Do you go out to a fancy restaurant? Do you hit up the movie theater? Do you do a casual at-home date? What about gifts? The answer depends on what kind of relationship you are in, and what level it is at. Here are a few tips on how to handle the big day no matter what stage you are in.

A Crush

If you have a crush on that girl in your CPA class, there are a few ways to handle Valentine’s Day. Play it safe and leave her a note on her car, or just go for it and ask her out. Leaving a note can be a precursor to asking her out on a day that will bring less pressure while asking her out is making more of a statement. Who knows? You might impress her to the point that you eventually wind up in a serious relationship together!

Casual Dating

If you’ve only been dating your medical assistant co-worker for a few weeks, you can play it casual on Valentine’s Day. It’s important to recognize the day, and your relationship, but you don’t need to go over the top. In fact, doing so may lead your significant other to think things are moving faster than they should be. Go for dinner and a movie and maybe add a box of chocolates.

Serious Dating

A more serious relationship calls for a more serious celebration on February 14. If you have been dating for several months or at a point where things are starting to look more…”permanent,” it’s time to pull out all the stops. Flowers, chocolate and a night out on the town doing what your date loves will add up to a great night. However, remember that what one person thinks of when they think of a big night isn’t always what another thinks of. If a swanky restaurant isn’t your style, a sporting event or take-out Chinese can be just as special.

Married Couples

If you’re married, you’re not exempt from celebrating Valentine’s Day. In fact, this holiday can be an excuse to put the stresses of life aside and show your love for your spouse. Flowers, gifts and a fun date are all great gift ideas. The point here is just to do something you wouldn’t normally do. If you’re the romantic type, consider eating at the same place you did on your first date, or snuggling up in bed with a movie that holds sentimental value. Celebrating doesn’t have to cost a lot of money or be a big deal.

As you plan for Valentine’s Day, keep these tips in mind. Celebrating at an appropriate level for your relationship will lower the pressure the day can bring and will help you find the perfect way to say, “I love you.”

Let’s be honest, there are times when you just want to say “no” to a date. Whether it’s because you are taking a break from dating, or know right away the relationship won’t go anywhere, there are times when it is appropriate to tell someone no.

But how do you do it in a polite way? The trick is learning how to be honest, but still kind when you turn down a date. Here are a few ways you can tell someone “no” without crushing his or her dreams.

Give Him a Reason, But Not An Excuse

When he asks you out, and you have a legitimate reason not to go, be honest about it. However, never lie and make up an excuse. If you already have plans that weekend, tell him that. If you are interested in someone else, tell him that too. It’s much easier to be up front and honest from the beginning. That way, no one will feel “lead on” and both parties can go their own ways.

More than “Just” Friends

Instead of telling someone you aren’t interested in them and that you “just” want to be friends, rephrase the sentiment. Instead, tell her that you really love the relationship you have, and want to keep things how they are. Emphasize that you love the relationship, and your friend will feel respected, but also get the message. Taking “just” out of the conversation will help someone feel valued, despite the status of the relationship.

Don’t Keep Them Waiting

If you have no intentions of going out with someone, never lead them to believe otherwise. If you are saying “no” because you know you aren’t interested in him, don’t say something like “I can’t this weekend, but maybe some other time.” You know you don’t really mean it, but they think you do. Fake sentiments and promises don’t help anyone.

Miss Manners

No matter what, always be polite. Asking someone out takes a lot of courage, and being turned down can be hard to take. The more honest, yet kind, you are, the easier the let-down will be. You’ll also be seen as a person who knows how to respect others, and as a mature dater.

Being turned down from a date is never easy to take, and neither is turning someone down. But, by using some common sense and dating etiquette, the experience doesn’t have to be as painful as it could be.

Dating is fun, but double dates can be twice as fun. When you go on a double date or a group date, you suddenly have enough people for activities you couldn’t do with just the two of you. Even if you do just go out to dinner, conversations are completely different with a group than with a couple.

In case you need a little persuading, here are three reasons you should plan a group date.

Reason #1: You can explore new activities.

With a group date, it’s possible to do something like frisbee golf and other active things, like hiking, can be more fun with a group. A great group date activity is to break out some board or card games, and order in. Chinese food and Uno can be all you need to spark a new relationship or add some excitement to one you already have.

Reason #2: You get to bounce off of new personalities.

All the members of a group date bring something new to the table. They each have different personalities, likes and hobbies that can add to the conversation and even the date itself. For example, maybe one member of your group is studying how to become a zoologist. A great date would be to go to the zoo as a group, and let your zoologist-to-be friend fill you in on fun facts about  all the animals you see. Or, if a member of your group is a karate teacher, he or she could take you to the studio to learn some moves.

Reason #3: You will bring out true colors.

Socializing as a group is much different than socializing with an individual. When you take your crush on a group date, you’ll get the chance to see how he or she is in a group setting, and vice versa. Sometimes personalities can change slightly on a group date and this will give you the chance to see if you like what you see.

There’s no doubt about it, group dates can be a great way to mix up the dating scene, try something new and get to see your date in a whole new light.

Asking out that cute girl you sit next to in your business management class can be one of the scariest things you’ll do this semester. However, you can increase your chances of getting a “yes” by asking her out in a way that makes her feel special and that you are sincerely interested.

By Text

Text messages are rarely personal. They are great if you are already in a relationship with someone, or if you aren’t asking them out on a date. However, the girl you are about to ask out deserves a phone call. Do yourselves, and potential relationship, a favor by asking her out on a date over the phone or, better yet, in person.

Last Minute

Giving your date a little notice is a sure sign you are worth her time. By giving her advance notice to make time for a date and even to get a little dressed up, she’ll feel more confident and respected. Asking your crush out 5 – 7 days in advance is a good rule of thumb. Also, while your room mates may think they are clever, steer clear of the pick up lines.

Nonchalantly

You may be trying to play it cool, but your date may see it as a sign you don’t feel she’s worth your time. Don’t casually ask her out by telling her you “just happen to have an extra ticket” to a concert. Tell her you would like her to come with you, and ask if she can. She’ll feel honored and special, just how she should feel.

Second Choice

Never, ever tell your date that your first date fell through, and are wondering if she would be willing to come along. There is almost nothing worse than having your date feel like she is second rate.

When you ask a girl out, the basic rule to remember is that your goal is to make her feel special. When you make a little extra effort to ask her out in a respectful way, your girl will be much more likely to fall for you!